It seems like, worry, doubt and fear is a very widespread “illness” in our society. Almost everyone seems to worry that this and that may happen. A lot of people are worried about their future, their financial situation, that their husband or wife may leave them, that they may get ill, have a terrible accident… and there are surely hundreds of other worries and fears.
Are you one of them? Do you worry too much as well?
Living in constant worry, doubt and fear makes your life miserable and it takes away all your joy, fun and happiness.
What for? Most of the terrible things you imagine and you are afraid of actually never happen anyway. Just look back at the last 10 years of your life and analyze all those worries and fears that crossed your mind and caused you sleepless nights.
How much of it did actually come true? Probably very little. On the other hand, things may have happened you didn’t even imagine or think about.
So, why spending weeks, months and even years worrying about something that probably never happens? It just doesn’t make any sense to torture yourself because of something that only exists in your mind and has nothing to do with your current reality.
Let’s say, because of certain events and circumstances your logic tells you “things don’t look good…” and you start worrying. Here is what happens:
- Because of your worries and fears, you will start feeling worse and worse.
- Whenever there is an event you would normally enjoy, those nagging fears will take away most of the joy.
- Staying for a long time in the emotion of worry and fear will not only make you tired, but it will also make you more prone for illness.
- As within, so without. If you spend most of your time in worry and fear, you will also create unpleasant events and circumstances in your life that correspond with the energy of fear. In other words, there is a good chance that you will actually manifest what you are so afraid of – just because you constantly think and worry about it.
In other words, there is absolutely nothing good that can come from spending only even 1 second in worry, doubt or fear.
If I could see at least 1 tiny advantage you could get out of worrying, I would say: “Yes, every now and then worry for a few minutes, because it is good for…” But, there is absolutely nothing positive about those negative emotions and that’s why I suggest you simply banish worry, doubt and fear from your life.
That’s right, you no longer need those emotions, you are done with them, so, just let go of them.
But, bad things happen to people every day…
Of course, unpleasant things happen to all of us. BUT, to constantly worry about what could happen won’t prevent unpleasant things from happening. Quite the contrary, that’s actually a very efficient way to attract more unpleasant things into your life.
Yes, unpleasant things happen. But when they happen, we simply deal with them, we find a solution and we grow through them. We become bigger, wiser, better…
And believe me, tackling those challenging situations is far easier from a positive mindset than from a mindset that’s entrenched in worry, doubt and fear.
Also, you may have already realized that being in the middle of a storm and dealing with a challenging situation actually feels better than the state of dense fear that only exists in your imagination and is created out of the constant worry that something bad MIGHT happen sometime in the future.
So, I think we can agree that spending even a minute in doubt and fear won’t add anything positive to your life.
But, the big question is how can you get rid of your worries and fears?
You say, those emotions just overtake your life and there isn’t much you can do about it. That’s wrong, because those worries and fears are simply the result of unhealthy thoughts and beliefs you engaged in over and over again – thousands of times.
The exact same way you created those fears, you can also get rid of them and replace them with much better feeling emotions. All you need to do is to change those core beliefs that lead to negative thoughts, which in turn create your worries and fears.
You may smile about the child who is afraid of the green monster in the closet, but most of the worries and fears of us adults are not any more real.
Just think about some of your fears – right now, they are only a product of your imagination. Once something unpleasant happens, you are no longer afraid of it, because it already happened and you have to deal with it. But then you may be afraid of what could happen next. And again, at that stage, “what could happen next” will only exist in your imagination.
Back to our anti-fear solution…
- Yes, figure out what are your negative core beliefs that lead to fearful thoughts and emotions. Then, look at them, analyze them, turn them around… and realize that they have no validity and let them go.
- Become aware of your negative thoughts that cause those nasty, fearful emotions. Whenever you catch yourself indulging in those kinds of thoughts, just say stop and simply refuse to think any more of those thoughts that don’t do you any good.
- Simply “change the topic”, like in a boring conversation and think about something more uplifting – change your train of thoughts
The process is simple, but it will take some time and practice to establish the habit of “dropping unbeneficial thoughts” and “changing the topic” towards something more positive.
I always recommend to keep a daily diary where you write down how many bad thoughts you caught and threw out of the window, how long it took you to become aware of a train of negative thoughts, how easy or difficult it was to change the topic… and anything else that seems interesting and helpful to you.
Your current way of thinking and being unconscious about your thoughts is a habit you probably built over several decades. This has become a very strong habit and it won’t be possible to break it in only a few days and replace it with a completely new one. So, please be patient.
Every day, make a conscious effort to break those old patterns and don’t judge your immediate results. Give it at least 2 months – that’s not very long – and you will have formed a tremendously powerful and positive way to control and consciously direct your thoughts, which will allow you to get rid of your worries and fears for good.